A lot of people wonder why they’re not able to meet or attract a person for either dating or a life partner. There are a lot of reasons for this, but we often settle for less than what we truly deserve. If I were to pinpoint the number one reason why that might be so in a person’s life, it would be of how unaware and unconscious people are the way they present and project themselves to the world.
Whether you are conscious or unconscious of how you present and project yourself, I want to let you in on a little secret – it’s entirely possible to change your results and how the opposite sex reacts… in an instant.
How you may ask? Is it a magic pill or formula even? Nope. How you can get these “instant results” is actually pretty simple and not all that hard to take on.However, the key realization you need to make is that it’s within your power and grasp to change not only your dating life, but the outlook of your life overall.
While these ‘quick-fixes’ may be obvious, how much attention, time and energy are you actually putting in these areas can make a world of a difference in catching the eye of someone you find attractive and catapulting you beyond the first instance of eye contact and into surface level conversation.Here are some of the key areas you should focus on:Fashion – your fashion sense should be a reflection of yourself. It should resonate with your personality, interests and what “scene” you most identify with. If you feel and believe you have “no fashion sense whatsoever”, reaching out to friends who you think have good fashion sense can help you in turning this area of your life around. Generally well-fitting clothing that is suitable for your body type is something that you should pay attention to as well.
In addition to that, there are plenty of free resources available to you. You can pick up fashion magazines that are geared towards men or women that fill magazine stands to get a sense for what the latest fashion trends are. You can check out free resources like Kinowearfor men orThe Fashion Spotfor women for the latest and cutting edge fashion tips and model yourself based on their incisive insights on fashion and upcoming trends.Updating your hairstyle – this is an extension of fashion, but getting an up to date or trendy haircut can change your results immediately where people will take notice. If you’ve been a repeat offender of fashion crimes, this is something that will change your results immediately with compliments flowing your way in no time.Smile – your smile is probably one of the most important things about you can change to boost your attractiveness by a few points. If you have a less than perfect smile, you might want to consider getting braces in order to have a smile that beams of confidence and invites people to talk to you.
I’ve heard and witnessed friends posting pictures on HotorNot.com to see how they would rate in their “before braces” and “after braces” pictures, and each time the after pictures would be rated at least 2 points or more.Body language – studies have shown that 93% of communication is done through body language, while the remainder 7% is done through spoken word. We can go deeper into this topic, I’ll keep it to the four most important things you can do to change your body language to one is more powerful (or elegant) and sub-communicates confidence.
• Eye contact – making direct eye contact with someone we find attractive can give us a shot adrenaline because it’s an acknowledgement of sorts and an opening to start conversation. Holding easy and steady eye contact (with maybe even a smile or smirk) is extremely powerful. There’s a reason why there’s the saying, “the eyes are the window to the soul”. It’s because when you hold easy and steady eye contact, it says so many things positive things about yourself without having to say anything about yourself at all.
• Tonality – this can be the smoothness of your tonality, the inflections in your voice, how steady or sultry your voice – how it sounds comes from how comfortable you are.
• Posture – have you ever been attracted to someone who had a slouch that reeked of self-defeat and low self-esteem? My guess is probably a resounding, “No.” When you change your physiology, that is your posture, how you stand affects how you feel. Conversely, we can interpret a person’s posture in terms of how confident, self-assured and centered in themselves they are. By changing your posture, it also affects the way you feel. If you were to compare how you feel if you had your head slightly tilted up, open chest and wide/relaxed shoulders, you feel a lot better compared to having a slouch or body language that signifies weakness or insecurity.
• Touching – the way you touch a person be it firm handshake or gentle brush on the arm can communicate your comfort, interest and attraction towards a person and in turn generate those feelings in them as well.Genuine interest – when you communicate that you’re genuinely interested in someone after discovering something about them, you can’t help but tell them verbally or non-verbally. Having genuine interest is the bedrock of having a connection with someone and them to you as well. When you inquire or find out something that’s cool about a person, dive into a little deeper and smile from ear to ear with your approval. Don’t over exaggerate it, but prod a little deeper and delve into the other person’s passions – this is probably one of the easiest things you can do in terms of expressing yourself and getting a person to express themselves fully to makeTake Action – fortune favours the bold. Sometimes in order to spark a conversation with someone you find attractive and find out more about him or her, you actually need to start a conversation by saying something as simple as, “Hi, I saw you over there and you looked interesting, so I came over here to talk to you. My name is ____”, and take it from there. That’s all it takes! Just. Say. Hi.
If you feel particularly shy or unconfident in meeting new people, I wrote an article which you canfind here.
Keep in mind, however, that these are just quick-fixes. They are more or less filling in holes that you might have not been aware of in how you present yourself. If you keep these few things in mind and work on them constantly, you will get results. What might have prevented you from connecting from that guy or girl you’ve just met or wanted to meet and had a crush on for a week or two, but was too shy or not confident enough to approach or open yourself to that person in the first place.
Changing your exterior will only get you results but only up to the point where you spark a conversation. Maybe you’ll gauge enough interest to warrant a date – or maybe not. Going beyond that will ultimately be determined by things that are deeper than surface the level of yourself such as the vibe you’re projecting, your belief system, mindset, passions, knowing yourself and your purpose in life. Those can only come with time and continually cultivating yourself in becoming who you want to become and constantly evolving, which will be covered in an article in the future.Remember to have fun with this and let us know if you found this article helpful or getting any results!If you liked this post or got any value of it, please Digg and Retweet – Thanks!