In this summary and review, I will give you the content in a nutshell, along with my own observations to enhance comprehension / effectiveness.
Liel Lowndes (author) begins by setting forth the acronym “U.S.S.”, which is a stand in for Under Cover Sex Signals.
This essentially means: A females nonverbal show of sexual interest in a prospective suitor. (I.E. You)
We are lead to understand that these U.S.S.s ’s are, for the most part, intentional.I would like to add that well beyond the ‘intentional signals’ described within are a gambit of signals that women give off completely unintentionally. It is well to remember this, as a woman may not have noticed that she has given you the go-ahead, (or series of go-ahead’s) that you then act upon.This said, she may well be surprised when you materialize right in front of her.When this occurs, an additional measure of charm should be employed, as a startled target (originally attracted to you or not) is far less likely to feel completely at ease than one who consciously beckoned you with her U.S.S.s’s.
However, Liel premises his book with a fine point:
Most of us are completely oblivious to many of the intentional signals that women give us to incite our attention for potential parings.
I constantly have male and female friends alike mentioning, “Were you just not interested in her for some reason? It was obvious she liked you…”
and my reply is generally, “She did? Shit!! I was too busy having a good time to notice! Is she still here?”
I bring this up because of the content that is put forward within the pages of Under Cover Sex Signals is broken down into nice, compartmentalized pieces that are easy to digest while missing a very over arching point:More important than the individual points the book makes, or the information that it offers us for our enhanced observation of U.S.S. from the women in our environments, the greatest application we can take from the research is that we all miss these signals regularly. Thereby the book is a good study for all levels of bachelor. Beginners no less than the advanced.
This books chapters do not break down well in ’summary form’, so I will be shooting from the hip with this summary. Remember, you can always go read it for yourself 😉
From meeting to dating to relationships, we will have better chances of succeeding if we are attuned to U.S.S.s. This allows us to pick up on the signals that women broadcast 24/7.
These signals are both positive and negative, and can be read like a book once the U.S.S.s language is known and understood. Comprehension and utilization of these signals will improve with time and application,, however we cannot even begin until we know its basic alphabet.
Speaking of the alphabet, Liel puts forward 26 U.S.S.s in total, (*more kitschy than functional I suspect, as these are by no means ALL of the signals a woman broadcasts by any means. However they are some of the signals that novices and advanced gamers alike tend to miss, by the virtue of being very simple. And by this token they are pretty damned important to get our heads around.) and he goes on to state that like the alphabet, these signals can then be compiled to form ‘words and sentences’ once a man is familiar enough with the alphabet to piece it all together. (*again, kitschy, but not in a bad way!)
*Please see the enumerated list of all 26 U.S.S.s, plus a short description of each at the conclusion of this book summary.By looking for ‘clusters’ of signals, we can identify:
– the requisite actions we should take
– the timing for these actions, and
– the strength of response we should use.Liel makes a number of suggestions regarding the above,, but it can basically be boiled down to this:
– requisite actions = match your signals to hers.
– timing = immediate casual response.
– strength of our actions = match your strength to hers
*I strongly agree with all three of these, (particularly the ‘casual’ part) but would like to add that it is necessary to seek opportunities to escalate the exchanges in some way. This way she will not become board or frustrated with the game and move on to a new target, leaving you to play catch-up after she has lost interest. My direct recommendation is this:
– Since you have discovered yourself in a scenario wherein you are the target,, feel free to take a few risks. the worst that can happen would be that you have misinterpreted the U.S.S. and nothing will come of it. At best, you will find it extremely pleasant to turn the tables and “be the one who is chased”, when all too often it is the other way around. In your risk taking,, keep in mind the words “playful” and “cavalier“. Tons of fun can be had here!
In chapter two we get a warning from Leil about the quandary of men being from Mars and women from Venus. But instead of ranting about the differences between man and women, he points out that women who are intentionally throwing off signals that guys are missing are quick to become frustrated and move on. He insinuates that this is why a woman will suddenly grow cold in mid conversation and pretend that you are a piece of furniture, when moments ago she was all smiles and inviting gestures.I tend to agree. In my experience, it is VERY rare that a woman will go cold for absolutely no reason. She has her reasons, you can be sure. But we missed our cue, and who has not encountered the female problem of “Well, if you don’t know,, I’m certainly not going to tell you!” This equals an epic fail, seemingly out of nowhere. As men, lets just pay more attention, mm’k?
Round about chapter 5, Lowndes states that only 1 in 31 men are really attuned to the signals that women toss out like candy…I have no idea if this number is legit, but I do know that if its not 1 in 31, is much worse.
…and he continues with a chapter on how women are more emotional than men and our logical tendencies rob us of the ability to perceive the communications that seem transparent to the women who think that they are being transparent with their U.S.S.
Sound pretty basic? I agree. But there was a gem in there that is worth bringing to light.
Because women are far more deeply rooted in the emotional depths of interaction, they are also more keen to both recognize symbolism, and communicate symbolically.Liel does not delve into this much, but its definitely worth bringing up. In fact, I feel that this is THE end-all and be-all reason that comprehensive dating has been labeled “gaming”.The word “gaming” has come to be an ugly term to most women.To them it means that a man is attempting to use some sort of super sleuth ‘trick’ to get her pants off.Now, this is not without empirical evidence to be sure. There are a lot of jerk-bags in this world who give the word ‘game’ a bad name. I have been reluctant to use this word myself in the past, due to its negitive implications. But the word more than adequately describes most scenarios wherein a man is ‘playing’ (and I mean that as “playful”) along with U.S.S.s after first contact has been made.More, because women are far more prone to (and adroit at) symbolic gesture and meaning, a man must ride the ebb and flow of this tide and still manage to keep his head above water.This can be ULTRA fun when thought of in the appropriate light,, and honestly, the word ‘gaming’ fits very well, since the purpose of a game is to have fun.Case and point:
Gaming = Playful. Exciting.Gaming does not need to = Exploitation. Misleading. Thanks for allowing me the rant.
Speaking of Gaming and Fun as one and the same, here is a bit of wisdom from about 1/3 of the way into Under Cover Sex Signals:
Imagine that you find yourself in a restaurant where no U.S.S.s are apparent to you. Is all for not?
Nope. This is when Leil recommends you begin to practice trying out the 26 signals for yourself.
If there are no immediate bites, do not tuck your tail and go home to your fridge for leftovers.
Keep it up until there are readable responses.
“…guys read this as Rejection with a capital “R”. While licking their wounds they wonder why some guys have the edge with women and they don’t… those guys are getting all the action and aren’t even good looking and some have dud personalities… The successful man never gets rejected because he tests the waters first.”
“… jocky yourself into position so that you are in her direct line of sight… keep a friendly and gentle gaze focused on her. Eventually, she will sense that you are looking at her and will look up. So far, so good. Then you give her a small respectful nod and a smile. She will look away… Expect it. This does not mean she is not interested! She is simply giving you the most common sex signal known to womankind, (U.S.S. #3) the Shy Geisha.”Whether it’s called a #3 or not, these are words to live by!Remember that testing the waters in this way can be extraordinarily pleasant. I say again,, remember the words ‘playful” and ‘cavalier’ and you will do very well indeed.-
This book summary to be continued!
Check back for more on Under Cover Sex Signals.
We are about 1/3 complete, and this is a book worthy of review.